The happiest moment in a woman's love life is also the most difficult. When, having survived a thousand trials, she has finally learned the mechanism that governs the market in love: being yourself is not enough, one must strive to be a little better or at least to look like it. Today, emotion capitalism has become the only reality we master, but there remains the age-old question of choosing between men "with a fixed rate, who you won't get out of your way even if you pay them," or "with a variable rate, who in the morning you never know if you will find them in the same mood as at night." If it is true that "there are no unreleased assholes, only variations on themes already used by the one who broke our hearts in high school," it is impossible not to find ourselves in at least one of the experiences described in this catalog in which literary and relational genres are mixed. Thus we recognize the Asticella Raiser, capable of inducing us to ask forgiveness for having been chosen as victims; the Merchandise Not for Sale Exhibitor, a male declination of a cliché considered for centuries to be a female exclusive; the Amorous Speech Pusher, according to whom "You're the woman of my life" must be said on the first date. A course in sentimental re-education to transform oneself from an eternal saboteur of one's own happiness into "a woman who knows how to use all the resources she possesses, even that source of constant passives that goes by the technical name of mother."